So the whole world is either pregnant or just delivered the most delicious little babies. And why is Target having a big baby sale this week? Could they have least had the decency to have it before I spent all that money on diapers and swaddlers.
You know when you are in another state and you all of sudden notice all the MO license plates? You never notice them when you are actually in Missouri. You know why? Because you are one of 1000s of them. You don't stand out. It is when you are in Iowa and see all the IA plates that you realize you are the odd ball out. Sorry for the rough analogy but it is all I got this am. Basically, my point is the whole world seems to be pregnant and having newborns at the exact moment I'm not. When I was pregnant with my first I felt like was the only person in the world to have a baby. It all seemed so special and wonderful. But now I am sitting here with a swollen belly and an empty crib and I feel so lonely.
The other night there was a segment on the news about Kate Middleton and all the excitement surrounding her pregnancy. My husband and I just looked at each other. For some reason it dawned on us that moment no matter what happens in the future, a pregnancy will never hold that same excitement it holds for so many others. It is a hard reality. Pregnancy has always been such a fun part of the journey to baby for us. Yes, my pregnancies were often riddled with complications and trials but they were also filled with joy and anticipation that is unparalleled. Now our new reality is that fear will most likely be greater than is healthy. It seems so lonely at times but then all of sudden you are driving along in IA and you see that MO plate and it reminds you there are others (too many others) and even though we are not in the same car at least we are on the same road.
5 comments:
It's a very sad truth. (((hugs)))
It's a very sad truth. (((hugs)))
Oh yes. I had a little bleeding when I was pregnant again and I was hysterical. Three friends came into my kitchen in one week and told me they were pregnant (a few weeks after my loss).
Sometimes everyone is in a different boat, but it's still the same river. Some forms of sanctification are more painful, but all are real. And, The Lord will up hold you with His mighty arm in this time of grief. Take courage dear one.
Couldn't have said it better Rochelle.
Post a Comment