Tuesday, June 11, 2019

Widow Maker

You made me your wife.
You made me your widow.

I was told today to spend two minutes writing what widow means to me from my "widow coach". Yep, I have one of those now that's how weird you made my life.

Widow means old.

Widow means broke.

Widow means lonely.

Widow means...I don't know. Truthfully, I haven't given it much thought prior to 8 weeks ago but now I know it doesn't mean old.  I am 38 years old...and you made me a widow. Why would you do that to me, especially when you worked so hard to make me your wife?

Maybe I thought widow meant hopeless. I am trying to be honest with myself and stick to the things I know and not speculate on the details of the things I will likely never know. One of those things I know is you want me to HOPE for hope is not clinging to what you wish will be but knowing IT WILL BE!

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