Tuesday, September 9, 2014

Wait...are you still adopting? {and other pressing questions}

So by now you may have heard the BIG news, WE ARE EXPECTING!

After the shock and disbelief has settled a bit you probably have a few questions and hopefully we have a few answers for you all. Afterall, I think you all deserve to know as much as possible since all you have gone through with us and the support and love you have shown us.

When are you due?
My due date is May 1st. That puts me around 7 weeks pregnant. We debated back and forth waiting to tell everyone but it became clear we would need your prayers since hospitalization has been threatened already. And the really it came down to we are having child whether we have one for 9 weeks or 90 years on this side of eternity and we want everyone to celebrate with us every second of that incredible gift.

Are you guys still adopting?
First things first: a little background info.
Dustin and I have ALWAYS wanted to adopt. We discussed it on our first date for goodness' sake. Adoption was not a result of our losses in fact we have always been very fertile and we were making conscious efforts to prevent a future pregnancy. Heck, Dustin was to have a vascetomy soon...but I will stop talking about our reproductive systems because my husband will be mortified (again) and well it isn't really anyone's business.

We decided to adopt after Claudie because we were told by my diabetes doctor it was unsafe for both me and any future babies to get pregnant again...as you will remember the autopsy showed the cause of death as maternal diabetes. Our OB and perinatalogist felt it would be okay but I would have to have much better control of my diabetes. I had the best control of my life during the pregnancy with Claudie so for whatever that advice is worth.

...oh and a side note don't you love how people say control of diabetes. For anyone who has had Type 1 as long as me they wish they had control over it.  But I digress.

We are VERY cautiously proceeding with some changes we feel will make a difference this time around. It is also important to note Claudie's heart had enlarged several weeks before she died. Had an OB or perinatalogist been looking at my ultrasounds that I was having rather than an ultrasound tech they would have caught it very early. She would have been delivered and would have survived. So this time around we are in the care of perinatalogist primarily rather than as a consulting physician. This will provide a much safer level of care. With all that said, it is obvious I am very high risk and we know this pregnancy could end like the last three babies did.

So are we STILL adopting? The short answer is YES. We have always wanted to adopt and will still continue to do so. It goes without saying that journey will most likely take a detour while we try to focus on maintaining as little as stress as possible for me and baby during this pregnancy.

Another big question is:
Are you still having the Rummage and Bake Sale Adoption Fundraiser in a couple of weeks? Well, that brings me to my other piece of AHHmazing news! My dear friend and her caring husband are embarking on an incredible journey to baby #4. When I say these people are wonderful, I ain't blowin any smoke. This sweet couple has 3 beautiful girls already. One of which, Reese, was born with Down's Syndrome. The adorable 4th daughter they are adopting will be coming from China and also has Down's. This means this mommy will be caring for four kiddos under four, two with special needs and all the while working nights on one of the busiest ICUs in the city. They have already been pre-qualified and are trying to raise funds to bring this Miss Cutie Patootie to the USA to be united with her family:

Isn't she the CUTEST!!!??!!?!

So since our church no longer has a place for people to sit during service because so much has been donated and because we have a wonderful source for which to filter funds we have decided to do the Rummage and Bake Sale for the much deserving Wallace Family.
Here is their blog for the full story: The Reese Report

So on to the last question that I keep getting and feel so blessed to have friends and family who care:
How can we help??

1. First and foremost PRAY if you are so inclined. We could use it desperately and feel the effects of each and every prayer prayed.

2.  Be POSITIVE! We need all the good vibes headed our way. And don't worry we have thought of all the negative thoughts enough for the rest of you. So if you want to vent about your worries or fears and how you don't understand why I don't understand contraception when I studied the human body for four years, tell it your dog or cat, because we don't need to hear it and you will frankly only be hurting the baby.

3. Help with the Rummage and Bake Sale coming up. I committed to do a lot for this sale on my own before I realized heavy lifting and such may not be in the cards for me. So I would LOVE any help tagging, baking, organizing or whatever you can do to make sure this sale is GREAT. I MEAN DID YOU SEE THAT PICTURE ABOVE??! I need her cheeks to make their way to American soil ASAP so I can squeeze them! Also, donations for baked good and sale items would still be greatly appreciated but only if you can bring them directly to the church at this point. We still need large items for our raffle if you have goods to donate.

4. Tangible help is always appreciated. My mommy gave me a bad trait. She didn't like to take help from others. She always said it was embarrassing because it meant she wasn't doing her job (like raising eight kids with a debilitating disease wasn't enough). So I learned to say, "no thanks" a lot. A dear friend has taught me not only is okay to ask for help it is wrong to refuse it. So with said, if I do get hospitalized I may be asking some help with child care. Meal help is tricky because everything has to be extremely low carb. I would love any recipes you all might have however! Salads and veggies are getting boring fast.

How do you feel about this all?
The last few weeks have been nothing short of breathe-taking to watch God's sovereign hand at work.  For instance, immediately after announcing the news to my shocked husband in walked a mommy holding a little baby, with a GREY ELEPHANT IN IT'S HANDS!!! Now, tell me that isn't a God thing. But truth to told EVERYTHING is a God thing. And we are approaching this pregnancy very differently because we know this baby does not belong to us, but simply God is entrusting it's life with our care on this side of eternity.

For that and EVERYTHING that has come before, during, and after we are grateful...yes, even the fact I can barely form a sentence I am so sick after dinner every night. But I have never been so happy to feel miserable in my life.


Anonymous said...

Alyvia, this is SUCH incredible news and a blessing! I have been praying that this would happen for you, if it was God's will! I am going to pray for a healthy pregnancy and delivery!!! Prayers to St. Gerard as well, the patron saint of expecting mothers! Glad you're still going to adopt as well! This is all a part of the journey, isn't it?
-Christie R.


What an incredible story of God's faithfulness in your life!! Despite your own efforts to prevent this, and all your efforts to save your last children, God is still God of all and in control. Kinda crazy, isn't it?! I can't wait to follow your story and see all the other times God will "put us in our place" and remind us that HE is sovereign over ALL. :) Much Love!!!

Anonymous said...

CONGRATULATIONS!! Happy for you. It's funny...I've never met you, but my heart has broken with you & rejoiced with your family over the course of the past couple of years. Again, so HAPPY for you & wishing you nothing but the best!!

Victoria Potter said...

Congratulations! God will be with you every step of the way. May you allow him to carry you when he says it is needed. God bless you. 'Aunt' Victoria

Rochelle said...

We are SO excited for your growing family! What amazing news. I could not be more excited for you all. Wow. You are all definitely in my prayers. Yay!!!